Drinking games

To start the evening we are going to watch that New Moon bullshit.
The rules are:

1. Any time the Lanky Yank gets angry because she hates Stephanie Meyer
2. When Kristin Stewart bites her lip
3. Any hallucination scenes
4. When anyone turns in to a werewolf
5. Any Stephanie Meyer appearance
6. Any time we laugh
7. Super cheesy lines
8. When someone bites or alludes to being bitten
9. When Bella is sad
10. If you like anything about the film
11. If Edward sparkles

3 minutes in and we have had to drink 3 times. It's going to be a long night.
Not that I didn't know already but this is utter wank. I have lost count how many drinks we are on. We are only about 15 minutes in. The fact that this franchise is so popular only cements the complete lack of imagination and intelligence of today's youth. Throw in gay men and cat ladies and Stephanie Meyer can buy an island. Typing is difficult, burps are violent. Why did we put ourselves through this?

Who really falls in love with a vampire and a werewolf? Bella of course. She is bland as fuck. Maybe because her life is so dull she seeks the beasts in the night, fuck knows?

You're like your own sun. CLASSIC LINE!

THE END.